Friday, July 9, 2010

A bit of Filler?

I don’t really know what to say. I feel like I need to write something, because I know a few people check on my blog on a regular basis. Lately I have simply been so busy, that I can’t seem to carve out the time to write, or when I have a little quiet time I want to just kick back, relax and read. I’ve been reading some good books and blogs lately, perhaps I’ll write about that one day. And my social life has been busier than usual as well. It’s all good, and I’m fine – well mostly fine. Did have that flu a week ago. But generally speaking I’m doing ok.

I suppose I’m taking a break from writing without intending to. Hopefully in the next couple of weeks I’ll get my frame of mind back for writing, and I’ll open up a few hours a day for writing too. I want to! I even think that my not writing makes me grumpy.

So, thank you to anyone who likes my writing and for checking on me. Keep checking back, because I’ll be back – just not sure when exactly at the moment. Tomorrow is Jim’s and my 6th Anniversary, and we’re headed out of town for a night alone (no cats). Sunday is the World Cup. Next week is a busy one. Jim is “out of town” in San Diego meaning at a conference long hours, but coming home to go to bed. This is actually harder on both of us. Instead of just crashing in a hotel room just 5 minutes away from his meetings, he has a commute. And though my schedule is a bit more my own as if he is away, I’ll still be up when he gets up and will find it hard to work late into the night if I want. At least I don’t have to cook dinner! Oh, except for Wednesday when he invited a business friend over for dinner. So, another busy week in other words. Again, it’s all good.

A last note about my new wheelchair – I got the shorter armrests today, so my chair is totally set up as I like it, and my body is adjusting. My fingers aren’t pink and shiny anymore. My transfers are getting smoother, and my new straighter posture isn’t giving me a neck-ache. The second set of wheels is ordered but may take a while to arrive. So, I’m inclined to call it a success and am ready to move on – to buying a new cushion.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Sick

I wish that when I first start feeling sick that I had a better idea of what was going on. I’ll know I’m not feeling well but the feelings are vague and so I have to come up with theories.

Yesterday evening I started feeling chills, and shivering. My body ached and I just didn’t feel well. Took my temperature, and it read 100.3 – not horrible but significant for me. I rarely get fevers.

Theory 1: Bladder infection, kidney infection? The day before I had changed my tubing because my urine had gotten gunky. All seemed well now, but perhaps I hadn’t gotten the new tubing in fast enough, or drunk enough water that day? A low fever might fit with the bladder infection, but chills? And wouldn’t a kidney infection have a higher fever?

Theory 2: Bladder stone? I’ve never had one, so I really should find out what the symptoms are of these. More frequent bladder infections I believe. I noticed that twice recently I’ve leaked into my clothes, not around the suprapubic catheter. I assumed this was because of an infection – and part of why I changed my tubing. Was it instead possible that a stone was blocking the entrance of urine into my catheter? I think maybe it’s time for a visit to my urologist. I’m due this fall for a cystoscopy exam anyway – that’s a look inside the bladder. Of course I could get even more paranoid and worry about bladder cancer too.

Theory 3: Flu? This fits, though I hadn’t been around anyone sick that I knew. I did go to the Fair on Wednesday though.

Theory 4: A combination of a bladder infection and just general soreness from a private dancing lesson earlier that day. A bladder infection could cause the fever, and the dancing caused the soreness. The private dancing lesson is another story – it wasn’t supposed to be me alone, just turned out that way. It was wonderful to have a full hour of time with the instructor because I really felt like I was dancing – almost flying! My new chair is so much easier to twirl. An hour of holding my arms up though, is exercise, and by the end of it I was tired out.

Theory 5: Migraine. I have a history of visual migraines, ditto my brother and father. My oldest son gets and grandmother got the real painful headache type. I’ve never had a headache that I’d classify as migraine strength. But all day yesterday I’d been fighting a headache, especially on the left side. Of course, since reading My Stroke of Insight, I briefly thought about whether I might be having a stroke – but the headache wasn’t particularly severe, and I do get mild headaches from time to time. Can’t a migraine give you other symptoms too? Not sure about fever though.

Two hours later, after rummaging through the cabinets to see if I had enough Cipro to get me through the holiday weekend, and luckily I do, barely – I decided that I might indeed have a bladder infection, but that most likely I have a flu. The reason – I started feeling nauseous, and gassy, and began to worry about vomiting and diarrhea.

So, Jim slept in the guest bedroom, and I laid there alone with an extra T-shirt handy in case of sweaty chills, and a large bowl in case of vomiting, and I snoozed without really sleeping till about 6 AM, when I finally allowed myself to sleep because I thought it unlikely I’d have to run to the toilet. My stomach had settled.

24 hours later, I’m doing better now. My fever was lower in the morning, and is gone now. My stomach is still gassy, but I’m even a little hungry, so I think I’m ok. I had bread and a banana earlier, and so I’m going to try some soup for dinner. I’m lightheaded, possibly just from lying down all day. Still have a mild headache. Less achey. I’ll continue taking the Cipro to be on the safe side, no harm in it. Actually, the word to describe how I feel best is “exhausted”.

Is this how it is with other people? Is it hard for anyone when they get sick, to tell what’s going on? It seems to me that others don’t have this hard a time usually, but not always. Jim recently had a fever and felt ill, and our conclusion the next day was that it was probably allergies. I’m willing to accept that everyone has some difficulty, even with routine ordinary illnesses. I’m grateful (knock on wood) that so far I haven’t had even stranger or long lasting symptoms that end up with a more serious diagnosis. There are so many other things that could make it even harder to sort out what’s going on – MS, rheumatoid arthritis, cancer….

I would even say I’m lucky that all my theories are easy-to-fix things, which makes my concerns feel petty. All the same, I do wish it were easier for me to sort out my body sensations to know what’s up. An able bodied person wouldn’t have this difficulty with differentiating between a flu and a bladder infection. It would hurt to urinate with any type of bladder problem. So, I do think it’s a bit harder for me.

What a bummer to be sick too. I had gotten all the normal chores out of the way, so that we’d have a clear weekend! Well, perhaps by Monday I’ll be able to get out. And it could have been worse. I might have gotten sick next weekend, our wedding anniversary.